Aren't You Glad
by Junjou Writer
Summary: "But even so, with you here, calling my name, I can continue to live happily and ignoring my past." He opened his door, balancing me in one arm, before he carried me to the bed that feels so much warmer, so much softer, when he's on it with me. SASUNARU!
1. Aren't You Glad

Aren't You Glad?

The bruises I could deal with. Bruises could be covered. Pain could be ignored. Tears could be held back. The one thing I couldn't deal with was the way I limped after the beatings and being raped so thoroughly. I hated how HE always knew whenever Kabuto came home. I absolutely hated it.

I smiled as I sat in the booth my best friend was sitting at. The McDonald's salad in front of the stoic boy was only half eaten and he was sipping from his small cup. His raven bangs framed his face as the back sat up in spikes that reminded me of a duck's butt. His pale skin was a perfect contrast to his black and dark green flannel and blue jeans. His midnight black eyes looked over me calculatingly.

"He's home huh?" he asked stiffly. I only nodded and he stood, lifting the bag of food he most likely bought for me in one hand as the other disposed of his tray. He returned to me and pulled me up gently to drag me to his apartment.

He cleaned and properly bandaged my every wound and even gently rubbed a cold ointment inside of me that gave me instant relief from the pain. He was always so kind and gentle I couldn't help but start crying half way through the procedure.

"What's wrong?" he asked softly, sitting beside my naked form on his bed and running a soft hand through my hair. I sobbed louder and sat up to look at him as he watched me calmly with a cigarette between his lips.

"Why couldn't I have met you first?" I whimpered sadly. He wrapped an arm around me and pulled me against his chest.

"Don't fall for that Naruto." He whispered in my ear, his sultry voice sending chills down my spine. "Remember what life has taught you. The nicer they are, the more violent they become." He purred. I sobbed and shook my head.

"I won't believe that! You're always so gentle and kind. Yeah, you're not as sweet or romantic but I love you anyway!" I wailed against him. He rubbed my back soothingly and shushed me in the gentlest tone I'd ever heard from him before.

"Don't say stuff like that. You can't love me. I'm… unlovable." Was all he said. I rose to look at his face and kissed him once. He kissed back just so gently. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pressed myself fully to him and he kissed back hungrily. He wanted this just as much as I did. He pulled back and started kissing up and down my neck before latching on and sucking to leave a harsh hickey as I gripped his hair wildly and moaned, sprawling out in his lap, offering myself to him.

He laid me on my back in the middle of his bed and I expected it was going to go all the way. I wouldn't have wanted it any other way. I opened my legs for him, still completely naked and whined with a tug to his shirt.

"No…" he mumbled, pulling back slightly. He kissed a blazing trail down my body. "Not yet." He purred. I gasped and gripped the blankets as his hot wet mouth closed around the tip of my erection. His tongue pressed flat against it and he licked slowly up it. I moaned and an alternated version of his name left my lips in a quiet plea.

He nibbled the sides of it before engulfing it whole and moving on it, sucking and swallowing and humming. It was like he was trying to suck the pain right out of me; like he was trying to make it all go away with just that simple soft mouth around me. And it was working.

"Sasuke please..." I whispered, pulling him up to kiss me. His kiss was gentle and sweet and full of love. I only feel loved when I'm in his arms. That's my curse, the one man I could never have was the only one who makes me feel like I'm a real person. He pulled me against him and my hands rushed to push his jeans off and open his flannel shirt. He's funny like that; he only wears shirts that button up.

"Are you sure Naruto? What if this changes us? What will you do if Kabuto finds out?" he was genuinely worried for me. When isn't he worried for me? He texts me every fifteen minutes and calls me every five hours. I smile at the way he lets me remove his clothes and leave my mark on his neck.

I don't know many things about Sasuke, just that he's associated with Yakuza; I think his main job is Yorozuya but I'm not sure. I've never seen him actually fight but his chest and back is littered with scars of all shapes and sizes. I know he's half blind in his left eye and he has a never ending supply of money. And the other thing I know about Sasuke; he doesn't let people touch him. He doesn't like people in general. He says he prefers animals to people, but he treats me like a person and he lets me touch him, he just let me mark him. That makes me feel like I'm special to him.

"Let Kabuto think what he wants." I whispered and pulled him down on top of me. He eased into me slowly; worried about hurting me but it didn't hurt. He was so gentle. He waited, deep inside of me, for me to tell him it was okay. Even though he was throbbing and trembling and panting, he waited for me. "Move... please..." I whispered, pulling him into a soft kiss. He grabbed both my hands and intertwined our fingers as he slowly pulled out to push back in.

"We're going at my pace Naruto. I'm making love to you." He whispered in my ear. I moaned out the simple pleasure that statement made in my heart. I met his eyes and locked with him as he kept his pace slow and gentle but deep, pressing against my prostate every time. His eyes were even darker with lust and I couldn't look away from those amazing depths.

"Sasuke... I love you..." I whispered, unable to help myself. He froze and stared down at me. My eyes widened and I tried to pull my hands to cover my face. He wouldn't release my fingers; instead he pressed them flat out to either side of me and returned to his slow rhythm, steady and strong like the beating of his heart.

"I love you too Naruto." He whispered in my ear. He pulled back to watch me as he moved, soft moans leaving my lips at his every fucking twitch. How does he have this effect on me? How is he so good at making me melt into a puddle of goo? "You look like an angel." He whispered as he stared at me. He very slowly, very carefully picked up speed and the moans soon turned into screams and his once silence became soft needy growls of pressing release.

"Sasuke... it's too much!" I cried out as he refound my spot and pressed into it quickly and deeply. My body shook and clenched as I came, on our stomachs. He caught my mouth in a passionate kiss and came himself. I felt it deep inside, warm and consuming. We laid like that for god knows how long, just catching our breathing and waiting for our hearts to slow. Sasuke grabbed my right hand and pulled it to rest on his chest, where his heart was still racing.

"Only you can do this to me Naruto. No one else has this effect on me." He murmured. If that was so, then why didn't he let us date? Why was he so against it? He rolled onto his back, still nestled deep within me, and pulled me with him to lie on his chest. I fell asleep before I could think more of it.

I awoke to ringing, that annoying Nokia tone. My phone was ringing. I answered it and my ear was assaulted with drunken swearing and yelling. Kabuto. He'd lost the keys to the apartment and wanted to know why I wasn't there with his dinner ready and the bed waiting for him. I told him I was hanging out with a friend and he snorted and told me to get my ass over there pronto. So I got up and got dressed.

"Leaving so soon?" Sasuke asked calmly. He was smoking already and watching me with his special glasses on. How can he look so sexy in absolutely anything? I nodded dumbly and kept getting dressed. He got up and pulled on his pants and the flannel he was wearing, not bothering to button it up this time. Or maybe he didn't button it because some of the buttons were missing somewhere? Oops, did I do that?

"Yeah, Kabuto wants me home." I whispered quietly. He would probably hit me more when I got there. Sasuke seemed to agree with my thoughts because he slipped into his shoes and made me sit down so he could help me with mine.

"I'll walk you there, since it's my fault you are so late getting home as it is." Sasuke always spoke in almost a strange manner, always so... formal. "And Naruto... I really do love you..." He seemed to be struggling with himself. "But I'm afraid I might hurt you. I don't know what I would do if I ever became like Kabuto towards you." That's why he wouldn't be with me. My eyes widened as I thought of what he's always telling me.

"The nicer they are, the more violent they become."

"I still don't think you'd ever do that to me Sasuke." I whispered, leaning against him. "All you'd have to do is tell me you'll keep me and I'll never leave your side." I promised. He sighed and put his hand on my head.

"You've known me for three years now. And you've never left my side once as it is. Why would I give you another reason to cling to me?" he teased. I know he doesn't mind my clinging, if he did he would've stopped calling me years ago. "Let's go see your disgusting ball of slop that you call a boyfriend."

"You know you could be my disgusting ball of slop." I told him with a snicker at the disgusted face he made. "Yeah yeah, let's just go." I grabbed his hand and held it tightly. He returned my hold until we were just around the corner of my apartment. He let go and slowly pulled his hand back to his side. Kabuto was swaying outside the door. As soon as he saw me he started cussing and calling me a bitch and a cheating skank. He said he could smell the sex on me and he lunged at me, knife in his hand.

"Get back Naruto!" Sasuke stood between us and took the brunt of Kabuto attack, the knife dug through his arm. I didn't even realize I screamed his name until it echoed between the buildings and their eyes both looked at me. Sasuke punched Kabuto and kicked him, again and again and again. He was brutal, but calm. It was easy to see his Yakuza origins when he was like this. Kabuto was begging for mercy, quickly sobered, and bleeding a lot. I finally managed to drag Sasuke off of him.

Unlike some of my other boyfriends, Sasuke stopped fighting the moment my hands touched him. He went tense, like he was afraid to hurt me. He stopped moving and just let me pull him back and away from the poor excuse of a man on the floor. He was very careful in his movements so we didn't topple.

"Aren't you glad it wasn't me?" He whispered.

"Sasuke..." I hugged him from behind and he sighed softly. He pulled out his phone and called an ambulance. He was reporting himself it seemed. Ambulance came and a few police as well and I could just watch as everything went surreal and Sasuke was arrested and shoved into the back of a police car and I was seen to one myself.

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I found myself in an interrogation room explaining what happened out there. I looked up at the two cops, good cop and bad cop. Bad cop had grayish white hair and the lower portion of his face was covered while good cop was tan with chocolate hair and a scar across his nose. Good cop was currently asking the questions.

"Why don't you first tell me what your relationship is to Uchiha-san?" He asked politely, smiling at me.

"Well... um... I guess... I don't really know how to explain us..." I whispered. "I met him three years ago and we just sorta stuck together since. He's always there and he's... well... he's just Sasuke." I explained with a shrug.

"So are you just friends?" He asked slowly, his partner looking at me intensely. "Or are you lovers? From the way you talk about him it almost sounds as though you're having an affair." I stopped breathing when those words left his lips.

"An affair huh? I guess... we are. I never really thought about it but we are having an affair. He's my lover." I said with a small laugh. Good cop smiled slightly and nudged his partner.

"Alright, so tell us exactly how Uchiha-san and Yakushi-san got into the fight." The bad cop said with a slight sigh of annoyance. Was being nice to tiring for him?

"Well... me and Sasuke... kinda made love..." I blushed darkly and the nice cop, Umino-san as his badge said, did as well. "And then Kabuto called all drunk and I had to go home. Sasuke went with me to protect me from Kabuto in case he decided to start hitting me again. And when we got there Kabuto pulled out a knife and started calling me names and tried to stab me but Sasuke protected me. Sasuke... beat him up badly huh?" I asked quietly.

"Yakushi Kabuto has five broken ribs, a fractured nose, three missing teeth, and a concussion. He won't be getting out of the hospital for a very long time." The bad cop told me. I smiled slightly.

"That's good then. He'll be safe in the hospital. And maybe he can get help too." I studied the table. "My last boyfriend... he was like Kabuto too. He was all sweet at first, then he started hitting me. Sasuke found out... and he bashed up his car. Sasuke chased him away to protect me. He always sends people away to protect me."

"Can you tell us how you and Uchiha-san met?" Umino-san asked with a sad smile of understanding.

"I was working as a bar tender in a gay strip club." I smiled brightly. "It was a good job, a little annoying at times, but a good job. Well there was this guy this one night, and he kept pinching my butt and grabbing me when I walked by and I kept asking him to quit. Well finally, one time he grabbed my arm and pulled me onto his lap, started demanding I go home with him. I was all scared and trembling. But at the table next to him, there was this guy who had only ordered a single beer. That guy reached across and pulled me into his lap instead. He looked at my harasser and told him to fuck off because I was Uchiha property. The guy instantly turned away, practically ignoring me now." I laughed and scratched the back of my head. "I turned to the new guy and said, "Gee thanks teme. Think you could let me go now?" but he just kept holding me. He said, "No, he's somewhat annoying. Just stay like this for a bit longer okay?" So I did and he introduced himself as Sasuke and said if I was ever in trouble I should drop his name, and if it wasn't good enough, to give him a call. He wrote his phone number on my chest, gave me a super huge tip, and walked me home. We've been friends ever since."

"And how old were you when this happened?" Umino-san asked curiously.

"19. Sasuke had just turned twenty-one I guess. He was there to celebrate his coming of age." I looked at them. "Will Sasuke be in bad trouble?" I asked quietly. They looked at me.

"The extent of the damage goes far beyond defense, he will likely be charged with assault and battery, maybe even attempted murder, and this will definitely go to trial." Hatake-san said. I frowned. "You might even be called to the stand, on his behalf."

"Your testament could get him out of it. If you can show the jury that Sasuke was merely acting on instinct out of fear for his best friend, they'll probably let him go free." Umino-san smiled brightly at me. "It's not his first offense but it's his first of absolute violence."

"What do you mean? What else has he done?" I stood up and put my hands on the table. Hatake-san grumbled slightly and looked through a folder.

"Four years ago he was charged with possession and distribution of narcotics. He was selling dope for Akatsuki, a very influential yakuza gang in the Otogakure region. He was let off because the boss paid off his bail. Shortly after, Sasuke Uchiha disappeared from Otogakure. The same day he disappeared, Orochimaru, mayor of Otogakure, was found beheaded along with six other of his closest friends." My eyes widened and I sat down. "This is the first time Sasuke's been in the police's radar since that day. Can you believe it?" I shook my head.

"In yakuza gangs, if you want out, you have to do something for the gang. It used to be that they'd cut off a few fingers or your tongue so you couldn't betray them. Now a days, it's a lot less brutal to the person quitting. Sometimes you have to make a big deal, or sometimes you kill someone who poses a threat to the company." Umino didn't say anything more. He didn't need to. I stood and left the room numbly.

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Sasuke was sitting on a cot, leaning against the bench in the cell. I got to take him home today. But he had to go in for a court hearing in two weeks. I looked at him as he turned his head towards me. He could tell where I had just come from.

"How's the ball of slop?" He asked. I looked at him.

"Pissed… but he's… getting better. He doesn't drink, obviously… and he says he's sorry." He nodded. "I broke up with him. I told him I was moving out of the apartment, he begged me not to but I told him that you wouldn't hit me." He turned to me quickly. "I'm moving in with you Sasuke." I said. "My stuff is all already there. You're not getting out of this."

"Are you serious? Me and you in a house together? Alone? You've seen how violent I get when I'm angry!" He said in a panicked voice, running to the bars as the door opened. I leaned in and kissed him.

"But you won't. You won't get mad at me. I know you won't. You haven't yet and we've been together longer than any of my other boyfriends." I promised him. I took his hand and pulled him. "Let's go home Sasuke." I dragged him and he came along reluctantly.

"How do you know I won't get mad at you?" He stopped at a crossroad and squeezed my hand gently. I beamed at him.

"They always got mad, because they could tell I was in love with you. Why would you be angry about me loving you?" I stepped closer to him and nibbled his chin. An old woman looked at us and scoffed while her daughter stared at my bandages worriedly. Sasuke growled slightly. "Don't think about other people. Think about me and how much I love you." I urged. He simply looked at me and he was drowning in that soul of his, all his guilt and pained subconscious.

"Do you believe in kotodama?" Sasuke said as softly as he could. I stared at him confused. "It's spirit words, if you say them with intent, they become real." His eyes became hard and serious and swirling pools of black liquid lava. "You're beautiful. I love you with my heart and soul." He said. I nearly fainted. I leaned against him.

'I was so sad… this morning and last night… because I knew absolutely nothing about you. But you know what, I don't care anymore." He picked me up and carried my bridal style to his apartment. "I don't have to know everything about you. The past doesn't matter. What matters is who you are now and what we do together." I smiled and nuzzled into his shoulder.

"I never told you because whenever I start to think about my youth, everything that comes out of my mouth is a lie. The moment I say something it becomes a lie and it melts away. But even so, with you here, calling my name, I can continue to live happily and ignoring my past." He opened his door, balancing me in one arm, before he carried me to the bed that feels so much warmer, so much softer, when he's on it with me.

"Stop being all sweet on me. You don't have to say things if they make you feel awkward, okay sweetheart?" I struggled with pulling off his clothes as he gently removed mine. "Why is it, that I can't keep my hands off of you?" I growled, running my fingers over his sculpted chest, licking one particularly frightening scar from tip to tip. He moaned and ran his fingers through my hair.

"Baby, you got one hell of a mouth." He whispered huskily. I smiled and pushed him down. "Don't do that, I'll embarrass myself." His eyes were so hot, sucking me in, like he was the one about to give me head. "I've never lasted long when it comes to oral. It sucks when I really want to enjoy a masturbation session and all I can think of is your pretty little mouth wrapped around my cock." Those words went straight to my groin.

"Okay, you're totally getting it now. I swear it to you." I made my way down a beautifully tense abdomen and a sexy little v to the valley. Those pants were gone as quickly as I could make them and his hot cock was there waiting for me. "Shit, my throat's gonna be sore." I muttered before shoving as much into my mouth as I could. Immediately, I swallowed him down as far as I could go, massaging with my hand what couldn't fit into my "large" mouth.

"Naruto…" He clenched his eyes shut and held onto my hair like his life depended on it. "Fuck, just like that…" He seemed to like it when I rubbed the tip of my tongue against the underside. I chuckled around him and did it again and again until he was shoving me off, panting like he'd just run a race. "FUCK ME SIDEWAYS!" He yelled, pulling me up to a hard kiss. I kissed him back and brought his fingers to my mouth, wetting them with my saliva.

"No, fuck me sideways." I purred. He gulped and nodded, carefully and gently pushing his fingers into me. It felt so much better now, his fingers in as deep as they could, exploring my entrance. "Sasuke…" I sighed and moved back against his fingers. "I wanna do it, let me." I told him. He blinked and stared at me for a long moment. "You can just relax, trust me, I'll take care of you." As he laid back and I sat myself on his lap, preparing to take him all the way into me, I realized how much more those words meant to him.

He was staring at me all tender and loving… and scared. He was nervous, afraid to lose control, scared that something might happen and he wouldn't be able to stop it. Afraid something might hurt him.

I impaled myself on his hard dick all the way before laying my forehead against his own. "I'll take care of you." I promised him, before I started a fast passionate, needy pace of love-making.

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I sat in the stand and looked at the Jury. "Sasuke was only acting on instinct, he saw that something he cared about was in danger and he reacted. Yeah, he might've gone a little too far but he felt bad. If you could've seen the sadness in his eyes when he'd realized he'd almost killed another human being, you'd want to drown in his sorrow. Sasuke cried that night, when he heard of the extent of Yakushi-san's injuries. And he apologized to his pillow for three hours." Okay, so maybe I was exaggerating. Maybe Sasuke only apologized to his pillow once… because he came so fast that I hardly had time to make up for it. And maybe he didn't cry for Kabuto but rather, for the amazing pleasure we felt after the fifth round of hot sex that night. Did it really matter? Either way, it still happened.

"Thank you Uzumaki-san." I went back to my seat right behind Sasuke. I gripped his shoulder as the jury made their decision.

"We the jury-"

"If I win this-" Sasuke muttered to me. I waited with baited breath.

"Find the defendant-"

"When we get home-"

"Sasuke Uchiha,"

"I'm going to fuck you-"

"Charged with assault, battery in the first degree, and attempted murder-"

"Over the kitchen table-"

"To be-"

"Until you can't walk for three weeks."

"Not guilty." My breath hitched.

"YES!" I screamed, my mind already feeling the pleasure of me and Sasuke and steamy kitchen sex. The courtroom became quiet. I chuckled nervously. "I'm just so relieved." I said. Everyone went about their hustle and bustle and I threw myself into Sasuke's arms. "I love you so much!" I told him.

"I love you too." He bit my ear playfully and I grabbed his tie, pulling him down closer, for a more up close and personal kiss.

"'Aren't you glad I didn't give up on you?" I asked him seriously, nibbling on his lower lip. He nodded and smiled slightly at me. It was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen.

Kotodama, the ability to make words true by saying them with enough conviction and belief. Those three words were my kotodama. By telling myself every day that I loved him, that I needed him, it became true. And now, now I have him. He's all mine and I'm never going to share, not ever.


	2. Kotodama

**Kotodama**

I lived my whole life believing in kotodama. I believed that words were unneeded, false even. That was why, on that day, when I felt like my life was in the gutter and nothing I ever said was true. It was then that he smiled at me. He had such a beautiful smile, like an angel was trying to save my soul. He held out his hand to me. He looked younger than me, maybe seventeen.

"If you can't stand on your own two feet, then take my hand and let me hold you up." He said, pulling me up, though I was taller. He beamed and giggled like a girl and my heart stopped. It must've been then that I realized how truly gay I was. His big eyes, bluer than the ocean, were watching me with worry and care.

Don't look at me like that. Don't waste those emotions on me. I'm a lie. My whole existence is a lie. Kotodama hates me.

"You seem too nice to be sitting on the ground." He told me. "And what happened to your eye, did someone punch you?" He reached his fingers for my face and I flinched away. He blinked those impossibly blue eyes and I regained my senses. What was I doing, standing here holding hands with some goody punk? I'm yakuza dammit! I work for Akatsuki! I invented the one man beat down party! "What's your name?" He asked quietly, grabbing my hand back and holding it between his own. I couldn't speak.

"You're so beautiful." I murmured the first true words to leave my mouth since I was born. He beamed at me.

"Hey thanks! Bet you'd look like a pretty slick heart throb too if you weren't all banged up. Bruises don't look good on you." He smiled and kissed my cheek, my heart stopped beating for a very long moment. "So stay outta trouble, okay cutie? And by the way, I'm Naruto. You can come find me if you ever need me." He walked away, with his hands behind his back and humming amazing grace.

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I'm not sure why it was that I suddenly wanted out. But standing there in front of Itachi, it seemed like the only thing appropriate to say at the moment. I want out. I don't like this. I don't want to be some drug selling little bastard.

"If you want out of the business, you have to do something for us. Compensation." He said. I tilted my head.

"Give me a gun and a few gensu knives. I'll bring you Orochimaru's head on a platter." I told him.

Maybe that was why I found myself sitting on the floor of his office, carving through his neck meat and humming amazing grace while I did so. It was almost strange that I could kill him so easily. "I will see him again." I told myself over and over, hoping to release the words and make them true. I wanted nothing more than to be beside him once more.

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The words that brought me down into my sickness, the ones that were drowning me in the tide, were suddenly the words that were saving me as well. I felt sicker and sicker every time I said his name. Everything was a lie once more, it was meaningless. But then he was there, when I'd been searching for him for two years, here he was.

"Let go of me Goddammit! I've tried being nice but you're pissing me off!" His lovely voice shouted. I wanted to rip the eyes out of the man that was bothering him. All I could do was pull him close and look at the guy.

"He's Uchiha property, so keep your hands off if you don't want to lose them." I said darkly. The man turned away, completely ignoring my angel's existence now. Those blue eyes looked at me and there was absolutely no recognition there. Of course not. My hair was longer then, and I always had a black mark over my nose, drawn in with sharpie. I was a strange punk, to be sure.

"Gee thanks teme. Think you could let me go now?" He asked, crossing his arms as he was seated comfortably in my lap. I wrapped my arms around him tighter.

"No, he's somewhat annoying. Just stay here for a bit longer okay?" I asked him, taking another large gulp of the golden liquid. It burned and it didn't taste very good. I didn't know why people wanted to drink such a foul liquid.

"Alright. I'm Uzumaki Naruto. What's your sign?" He asked. I blinked before realizing he was asking for my name. What a weird way of saying it.

"Uchiha Sasuke." I said simply. He smiled at me. "If you're ever in trouble, just say you're close friends with me. And if that doesn't work, you can call me." I pulled out a sharpie. He stared at me.

"What ya gonna write it on?" He asked. I lifted up his shirt and wrote my number on his chest. "What the hell teme!" He shouted.

"Shut it." I muttered. I looked at him. He looked at me then blushed and looked away.

"Thanks man." He said. I fought to hide my faint smile.

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It was three days later when I got the call. I was lying in bed staring at the ceiling wondering what excuse I could come up with to go see him when my phone started blaring. I answered it immediately.

"Um Sasuke… I'm kinda… in some trouble…" he whispered. I frowned.

"What kind?" I asked softly.

"The "they want to kill me and they're trying to get in my house" kind!" He hissed.

"Where do you live?" I demanded. He told me and I stood up. I grabbed my gun, though I didn't think I'd need it. I ran to his house and stopped in front of the small apartment. I ran through the kicked in door and found three guys trying to get into a bathroom.

"Come on outta there ya little bitch!" One snarled. I heard Naruto squeak in fear. I marched over.

"That's my little bitch." I hissed. They looked at me.

"Well well, Sasuke Uchiha. Heard ya took off from the business some two years ago, what for? Was it shrimpy in there?" The largest sneered at me. The man to his left snickered.

"I heard he left cuz he didn't want the whores knowing he's impotent." He said. I smirked.

"You want to test that theory out? I'll have my cock shoved down your throat faster than you can blink." I hissed. "I'm not unable, I'm gay you fucktards. Get the hell out of my sight before I call the cops." I ordered. They looked at each other. "Look, I'm in a bad mood. And I have a gun." I pulled out my Smith & Wesson. "So what's your next move gonna be?" I scratched the back of my head. I pointed the weapon at the middle man. "Bang." I said. "Get lost or Akatsuki will have bounties on your head so high your own friends will be turning you in." Whatever would work.

At the mention of Akatsuki they high-tailed it from the apartment. "Dammit. Aren't I scary anymore?" I wondered aloud, putting my gun away. I knocked on the door. "They left Naruto. You can come on out now." He shakily opened the door and fell onto me.

"I was so scared! Dammit teme! Why where they after me?" He whined.

"The bar you work at has been meddling in their monkey business." I said. "They were going to use you as a warning I guess." I shrugged. He looked at me. "I took up a job, against my better judgment. Information is important." He frowned, he was shaking. "We'll report this to the police, but first, you need rest." I took him to my apartment and made him lie down in my bed. He was asleep within minutes.

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"Sasuke, what are you thinking about?" Naruto asked, falling into my lap. I looked at him and let him take my glasses off. His face got blurry in one eye. "You're not paying me any attention and it's making me sad." He whined.

"Oh, just this and that." I said, hugging him to my body. He purred like a cat against my chest. "Like the first time I met you. When I first fell in love with you." He beamed up at me.

"That's my favorite memory! Oh, and the one where you beat up Sai's car." He tapped his chin thoughtfully. I smirked. "And you thought broken pipes had no usage. I showed you." He smiled.

"Yeah, you showed my many many usages for pipes." He purred. "Let's make love again." I groaned and hugged him tighter.

"Give your ass a rest baby. We've been screwing like rabid rabbits all week." I said. He pouted. "I'm saying this out of concern for your safety. Over usage of that back passage of yours is gonna cause problems." I kissed his brow. He pouted.

"Fine, let's just reminisce about the old days like a couple of old fogies." He huffed. I chuckled.

"'you know, Kotodama saved my life." I said. He snorted. "It's true. The only thing I believed in was Kotodama. When I was little, I was afraid to speak. Then I realized everything I knew was a lie. I stopped caring about what I said. I told myself over and over that I was going to die in that world, the yakuza life. Then I met you. I said every day after I met you that you changed my life. You saved me. And it became true." He stared at me.

"It wasn't Kotodama Sasuke. It's never been kotodama. You had the power to change it all along, only you. You just need to believe more in yourself." He said. I snorted.

"Whatever. You believed in it at first."

"I don't believe in kotodama or destiny or whatever. If you want something to happen, ya gotta make it happen. That's what I believe." He stretched out in my lap.

"You're such a bullshitter." I snorted. The door bell chimed. "Uchiha-Uzumaki Company. How may we be of service?" I called out. A man came into the room and I stared at my older brother.

"Sasuke." He said. "I see you're doing well." I nodded. He came to stand beside me. "Some of the boys are wondering about you."

"Well too bad. They can keep wondering. I'm Yorozuya. So unless you're here to hire me, I'd prefer it if you left." I said icily. He nodded.

"As untrusting as ever… Though… it appears… your little fox has tamed you." He said. He looked at Naruto in my lap.

"Hey buddy, you're freaking me out. So tell us what you want or get out." Naruto shot at him. I smiled slightly.

"Very well. I'm here to hire your services Sasuke. I need some help." He sat down. "You see, my own little kitten… just happened to go missing recently. I want you to find who took him and get him back." He said. I quirked a brow.

"I'll need all the information you have on him. As well as a few supplies. As you can imagine, I don't work with guns very often anymore. I'll need a new one. Mine fell in a river." Naruto looked at me in shock. "I'll give you the charge after he's been returned safely, because price of this sort of job depends on danger factor." I moved Naruto to the chair by himself and looked at Itachi Uchiha. "This one's gonna cost you Nii-san, dragging me back into your yakuza business."

"It's one job. You can handle it." He shrugged. I nodded. What was I thinking, taking this job?

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I ask myself again, what in the world was I thinking?

"Let me hear him talk." I said to the wannabe gangsters. My shoulder was heavily bleeding and it hurt like a bitch. Naruto wasn't gonna be happy about that. My ribs felt broken too, maybe two months of no sex. Yeah, he's definitely not gonna be happy.

"Who's that?" Was the panicked voice of my brother's lover. Deidara was his name, blonde hair and blue eyes. Apparently, it's a taste that runs in the family.

"Sasuke Uchiha." I said simply. "Your boyfriend hired me to save your ass." I told him truthfully. He huffed.

"Too lazy to come get me himself?" He huffed.

"Or he's scared that his presence will put you in even more danger." I said. He was quiet.

"They have someone else now, he's young, un. Practically still a child in diapers. He's all unconscious now. But he's got these marks on his face, like whiskers or some shit. I thought maybe they gave 'em to him but it looks like they've been there for a long time, hm." I groaned and punched the wall. My heart was racing out of my chest.

"NARUTO!" I shouted, I kicked in the door and ran in, holding up the gun. There were three in there. Two shot me immediately in the chest and side. I looked at my blond who was knocked out on the floor. Deidara was tied to a pole, his hair was long but it was so full of blood and dirt you could hardly tell he was blond. I gasped in pain and stumbled closer.

Why? Why wasn't it working? I said it over and over. We'd be okay. Naruto would be fine. I'd be fine. Nothing bad would happen. Naruto coughed a bit and looked up at me.

"S'uke… how many did you kill?" He asked softly. I rose a brow.

"I'm not sure. Maybe twenty or more."

"They said you're a monster." Naruto whispered.

"Maybe they're right." I smiled at him. They were all waiting. There was no way I'd make it out of this alive. Kotodama was not on my side today.

"You know what, I don't care. Because you love me. Even if you're a monster." Naruto choked out a chuckle. "So don't give up. Say the words Sasuke. Say your Kotodama." I looked at him and struggled to stand.

"Kotodama abandoned me." I said weakly.

"No, show them what a monster you really are! Say the words to put your mind at ease and kill these stupid fuckers!" Naruto shouted. They pushed his head down against the cemented floors. I growled.

"We will make it out alive! All three of us!" I shouted angrily. I could feel the power of the words released and knew what Naruto meant. Because I believed the words this time, they became reality. I will make them reality.

I felt protected when I raised my gun and shot one in the head. I threw myself down to avoid the gunshots of the other two and got the first one in the chest, rolling to avoid more bullets and the second in the leg.

"Is this kid for real?" Deidara muttered. I walked over to the only one still living.

"Why did you take Deidara and Naruto?" I demanded, pressing my fingers into his wounds. He screamed.

"Boss's plans! He said if we took the blonde, Uchiha would go to you and you'd take the job, then we could take the other blonde and use him to kill you!" He whined. I looked at Naruto.

"They honestly thought you'd give your life to save me?" He snorted.

"Yeah, what's the point in saving your ass if I'm not there to enjoy it many times?" I asked with a grin. I pressed my gun against the guy's temple. "So who's your big daddy? Who's the brains behind this operation?"

"He's a Sabaku; you've got no chance against him!" He said. He started to laugh loudly. I rose a brow before blowing out the rest of his brains.

"If we're the monsters, then maybe you should've just let us be and never bothered us, eh?" I mumbled. "Sabaku, I'll kill you for messing with what's mine." I hummed. I moved to make sure my love was alright then hurried to untie Deidara. He looked at me weirdly.

"You're like Itachi right? I thought it was strange when you first came in, you seemed to care only for him, but it's more than that wasn't it? You're more than just in love with him; you're extremely possessive of him." He said. I smiled at him politely and helped him stand. "God, I've been with the bastard for three years and I'm still not used to this shit. You'd think I'd be desensitized to death now, hm?" He muttered.

"Oh my god, don't you ever shut up?" I hissed. "Just be a good hostage and shut your fucking trap!"

"Yeah? Well fuck you too asshole, un!" He snapped. He huffed with crossed arms and turned his back on me. I pulled Naruto close and kissed his forehead.

"Does Sabaku sound familiar to you?" I asked him, running my fingers over his swelled eye.

"Kinda… probably a customer of mine from the bar, why?" He looked at me all worried. I sighed and put my glasses on.

"'Cause it sure as hell isn't familiar to me." I grumbled.

"Sabaku no Gaara is the head of Kaze." Deidara turned back to us. "He's the youngest leader they've ever had. Actually, he got it because Orochimaru killed their last leader and he was promoted."

"Well now, Kaze Group, get ready for a fucking war." I reloaded my gun. Naruto jerked it out of my hand.

"STOP TRYING TO LOOK BADASS WHEN YOU'RE BLEEDING AND HURT YOU STUPID TEME!"

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"Thank you for saving me." Deidara bowed and I nodded to him. He turned and wrapped his arms around my brother. "I love you 'Tachi-kun." He purred.

"No sex until you're feeling better. Get in the damn car." Itachi said. He hid it well, but his eyes showed how concerned he was. I watched Deidara leave before turning back to Itachi.

"Three thousand." I said. "Since this job was the most dangerous I've ever taken on." I said, inspecting my nails. My arm was in a sling until my shoulder healed and three ribs on my left side were fractured. Itachi nodded and gave me the money in cash. I smirked at him. "Pleasure doing business with you." I said.

"Yeah… thanks." Itachi whispered as he left. I chuckled and went to my bedroom. Naruto whined sadly and looked at me.

"This sucks! You can't fuck me when you want to!" He said. I laid beside him and gathered him close to my chest.

"Tell you what, when I'm healed, I'll fuck you up the goddamned wall." I said. He blushed and smiled at me.

"I can't wait." He said, snuggling close to me. "You're not going after that Gaara guy are you?" He asked quietly. I shook my head and smiled.

"Not anytime soon. I don't know anything about him. I can't go after him yet." I said. He pushed me back.

"Don't go after him at all! He's not that important!" He said in a panicked voice. I sighed. "Yeah, I get that you're ex-yakuza and you have yakuza instincts, but you're Sasuke, not gangsta boy from hell! Stay here with me, happily… peacefully…" He begged. I kissed him.

"I'll… try… to live peacefully." I promised. He nodded with a relieved smile and returned to snuggling me tightly. "I promise to protect and love you no matter what." He sighed and let himself drift into sleep.

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"You're what?" I asked, looking at Naruto. My arm still had to be in its sling for another five days, then I should be free, but my shoulder would never move the same. It would always hurt to reach high.

'I said I'm leaving you. I'm done with you. I wanted to be with you because you were dangerous and exciting and new but let's face it Sasuke, we're not compatible anymore." He said, throwing his clothes in a suitcase. I stared at him. I turned and punched the wall, pushing my hand through the drywall easily. He shuddered.

"No, why don't you just say the truth? You're afraid." I said. He sighed sadly.

"You've been getting more and more violent lately. I want out before you actually hurt me." He said. I left quickly, pulling my shoes back on. I threw the bag I'd been holding behind me into the apartment and went to Kakashi's place.

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"Put me up for a bit, old man." I said, sitting down. "He left me." Kakashi frowned. He sat beside me on the couch. "He decided I was getting to violent and left me."

"Have you hurt him?" Kakashi asked sternly. I shook my head.

"No, never. I guess I've been breaking stuff more. And when I get angry, I stay angry longer." I shrugged. Kakashi gave me a cup of tea. "That must've frightened him." I looked into the cup.

"When your arm and shoulder's healed, it'll all go away, if you can get him back that is." Kakashi mused. I looked up at him strangely. "Because right now you're stressed out from a lack of sex. Happens to me and Iruka all the time." I stared at him in complete surprise. "You didn't realize? You're stressed and miss sex. Go get your lover back. Just don't bring your shit my way, okay?" He handed me a new pack of cigarettes. I frowned and looked at him.

"I hope I'm not too late. Naruto's horrible with guys." I grumbled. I went to his work to look for him. I wasn't too surprised to see him there. I was more surprised to see him on some guy's lap, giggling and playing with the short somewhat curly strands of red hair. I growled and stared at them. I turned and ran all the way to the Uchiha complex.

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"Sasuke, you look ridiculous." Itachi said firmly. I slipped on the colored contacts.

"It doesn't suit me ridiculous, or I look retarded ridiculous?" I asked, reviewing myself in the mirror. My hair was temporarily dyed purplish color and my entire body was painted a tan color with a four point star over my nose. My contacts made the whites of my eyes black and my irises red with little black dots in them.

"You look retarded." Itachi decided. He told me that the first time I dressed like this. I smirked at him.

"Well then, wish me luck, Aniki." I told him, pulling out my lucky handgun. "Kotodama isn't on my side." It wasn't right? That's why Naruto left me. Kotodama let him slip from between my fingers.

"Sabaku's had his eyes on Naruto for a very long time. If Naruto's with him, he probably did something to cause it." Itachi handed me a slip of paper.

"Go out with a bang, hm?" Deidara said with a small squeal. I nodded and fit my gun into my belt and pulled on a long coat.

"I'm off to go get my fox back." I said quietly. I left and went straight for the address on the paper, not caring what would happen to me.

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"Dammit… Sasuke…" Naruto whimpered in the room Sabaku gave him. He was crying, sitting on his bed. He held a bottle of pills in his hands. I slipped in through the window, knowing he was too preoccupied to see me. "I miss you…" He whispered. He held the small porcelain angel I bought for our anniversary and threw to the ground at our last meeting. It looked like he'd glued the wing back on.

"You know, if you kill yourself, I'll have to die alongside you." I said quietly. He jumped and looked at me. He had a new large bruise on his cheek. I growled and gripped my fists.

"Who… Sasuke?" He blinked. I nodded. "Why do you look like that?"

"This was… my traditional costume. Back when I was yakuza, this image struck fear into the hearts of many. All except for you. You weren't." I said. He blushed and looked down.

"That was you…" He muttered. He looked back up at me, tears in his eyes. "You were the first person to call me beautiful. I thought I'd never see you again." I took his hand and threw the pills far from his reach.

"Listen to me; I won't let you leave me. You're the reason I left the organization. So if you leave me, I'll be stuck in the darkness once again. It will be the end of my world." I jerked him up to me and kissed him passionately. "Why did you leave me?" I asked softly, holding his face, despite the pain in my shoulder.

"I…" He frowned. "Gaara loves me…" He whispered sadly. "But he said… if I didn't leave you for him… he'd kill you." I snorted. "He's serious Sasuke! You have to get out of here and forget about me!" He yelled. I pointed at his face.

"And leave you here with someone who does that? No way in hell." I snarled. I picked him up and turned to face Gaara in the doorway. "I'm taking what's mine." I hissed.

"No, he's mine." Gaara said. He pulled out a gun. "Put my lover down now."

"Let's see who's a faster shot, me or you." I said with my best grin, aiming my own gun for his forehead. I started to squeeze the trigger but he didn't. He closed his eyes. I held Naruto and stared at him. "You want me to kill you?" I asked softly. Naruto struggled harder.

"I'd rather die than see my beloved Naruto in the hands of another human being." He said softly. I nodded.

"I agree entirely." I said. I looked down as I pulled the trigger. "That's why I'm going to torture you the same way you tortured me." I said, looking at the vase I just shot. "He's mine and I'll never let you take him." I jumped out the window with Naruto. "Goddammit, my ankle gave." I sighed. "When we get home, I'm so bending you over the table, broken ankle or not." I hissed. He shuddered.

"I love you Sasuke…" he whispered. I nodded and pinched his ass.

"I love you too dobe." I said. "Does it really bother you? Me punching the walls?" I asked. He sighed and ran his hands over my back.

"Not really. Because I know we can fix it and I know you'd never hurt me. I just jump because it surprises me. Can I go back to being your partner?"

"Yes, but I want you to quit that bar job. You're mine." I said sternly. I kicked open our apartment door and dropped him on the bed. "Just yesterday you left me. Twenty-seven hours of pain have I felt. I'm going to punish you now, for each individual hour." I said, pulling out a pair of handcuffs and a riding crop. He nearly fainted against the bed.

Fuck Kotodama, I make my own destiny. If I want Naruto with me, I'm going to go and make it happen because Kotodama doesn't help anyone.


End file.
